Dear Crush...

 November 29, 2017

Dear Crush,

It’s been over two weeks since we first started chatting on Facebook. After I asked you a question as a lame excuse to talk to you, you learned from our chat last time after I asked you to like a picture for an assignment and continued to talk to me. You said “hello?” and I made the lamest pun regarding Adele’s Hello; it was really embarrassing, but I’d do anything to keep the conversation going.

You made my mornings and evenings exciting, always anticipating that you’d say hello to me and say something funny; always anticipating that you’d open up and talk to me. 

You were there when my dog died two days after we started talking; you told me stories about how your house is like a zoo despite of it being small.

I honestly don’t know what you really feel about me, even if you had told me a bunch of times that I’m pretty and that you like me; I don’t know how many girls you have said that to.

You have no idea how much I want to have a face-to-face conversation with you, but I’m too afraid that you’ll see me for who I am, for how selfish I am, how boring and plain I am, for being just a “what you see is what you get” product and that you’d like me less then like another girl, a girl prettier, has a nice figure and isn’t boring and plain as I am, someone who’d know how to make jokes and actually make you laugh.

I don’t know, I was just too mortified over the last guy I liked before you, the guy who chose another girl over me despite telling me that his feelings for me was too strong that he liked me more than he liked that girl; I was so devastated that he lied to me. When I told you that story, you told me not to tell a guy your real feelings because some of them will just play you; so I'm not telling you my feelings and instead, I'm telling everyone else but not you.

I really like you, I want to brag to everyone that someone likes me, but I'm not sure if you're mine to brag about.

Should I keep you as a fairytale far away? Or should I go down my tower and run with you? 

Sincerely Yours, 

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